I voted for Elisabeth Warren today, and here’s why. Please don’t assume I should automatically support Bernie, or Biden, because I am a Warren supporter.

I voted for Elisabeth Warren today, and here’s why. She is the best candidate for the job. I am fully aware that sadly there is little chance for her to be nominated as Democratic candidate. At any moment she can drop out, and that is why I voted today instead of waiting for another 2 weeks: I really can’t decide which old White male I want to vote for at this moment. To be clear, I will vote for whoever gets a nomination at General election, and will even canvass for “him” (we don’t have a chance of “her”, again, sadly).

When it comes to policy and vision, of course Bernie should be my pick. I’m from a country that has a single payer M4A system. I know how it works. It is a normalcy to me, and no way radical. As a researcher and educator specialized in sociology of food, sustainable food system, thus sustainable environment is always at the center of my issues. I was amazed when he called out America’s long history of intervening other countries’ democracy on national TV. That is the last thing I had ever expected to hear from any politician. American people should know what your military has done and is doing to people in other countries. I wish eventually he would call out what is happening in Okinawa as well — rape of the locals and pseudo-extraterritoriality of the US military, Henoko bay plan’s devastating damage on citizens’ life and environment, and suppression of protesters against the plan.

All these policies and visions, however, need to be put into practice, otherwise they are pie in the sky. I want pie on our table, if not perfect. Bernie’s job performance in Congress is underwhelming for his decades of career. To that extent I recognize Biden is the better pick. To be fair, he has been standing with the first Black president and provided a shield for him for 8 years, during which they did put Affordable Care Act in practice. Full disclosure: I was one of those who adored Bromance memes. Everyday at school I witness how impactful the memories of those 8 years are especially on black students and families. Nobody can and should undervalue that fact.

Above all things, I am apprehended by Bernie’s campaign. I have many Bernie supporter friends. They are amazing activists and fighters for social justice. I have great respect for them and by no means they are Bernie Bros. What I am talking is not about those each individuals, even including Bros, but about the culture that campaign embraces. #NotMeUs is intended to characterize his campaign as not only about Bernie himself, but about all people. But this is the very basic of social identity theory, i.e. in-group (us) and out-group (them), where in-group’s positive traits are enhanced by denigrating out-group’s traits. Bernie’s movement is by nature divisive. Any disagreement cannot be tolerated, and rather than recognizing it as the difference of opinion, it becomes a marker of “the Establishment” against “us”. When people started using snake emojis for a person who used to be a Bernie’s collaborator and can remain so going forward, it was obvious.

What bothers me the most is that Bernie doesn’t own it, or at least it appears to me that he doesn’t. He said he disowned those people. But I never see he did. A #BernieOrBust person who insinuated Trump would be a better choice than Hillary is still speaking at their rally. Positive things in movement are of grassroots people, while negative things in movement are of “Russians”. Then good supporters come to defend him, “It is not Bernie. It’s his fanatic supporters.” which uncannily echoes “His Majesty didn’t know. He always wanted peace. It was Tojo who did it”, the most consequential case of evasion of responsibility in human history, that is, Emperor Hirohito’s evasion of responsibility in WWII. It is undeniable that misogyny is deep seated in his campaign. (I also believe that Bernie said women can’t win.) Many of his supporters are condescending to POC and people with lower educational attainment. Unless Bernie addresses these facts to take ownership, instead of utilizing them as another marker of “the establishment,” I am hesitant to be on board.

“Martin Luther King Jr. said, 'the ends are preexisting in the means.' Whatever you are trying to achieve, the method of achieving needs to look like that. You want justice, you need to use just means. You want peace, you need to do it in a peaceful way. You want non-violence, then you need to find around a way to build a non-violent movement. You want inclusion, then you need to figure out how to build an inclusive movement. That’s what this campaign is about." This was a speech by Jason Lee, Community Organizing Director at the opening of Warren office in South Side Chicago. I cannot agree more.

So at this point, to me, Bernie and Biden are even. Because casting a vote is not only about what their policies are, but also about how they do. I need more information to break the tie. Probably VP pick. Performances in coming states. But again, no matter who will get a nomination, I will vote for “him”. Just please don’t assume I should automatically support Bernie, or Biden, because I am a Warren supporter.